365 days of love

Closed

2009-11-23T14:40:00.002-05:00

closed/hiatus

I hate to admit, but I'm closing this blog for the time being.
I felt guilty about this when I first realized how long it had been since I updated last. I had such high hopes for what I could do with this blog and I haven't used it to it's fullest potential. I'm not deleting it for that reason alone. I'd like to come back to this soon and be able to update everyday.

I'm still doing what I can to donate and help out when and where I can.
Just be sure you do the same :)

Days 63 - 66

2009-09-21T14:35:00.003-04:00

I'm organizing a Trick-or-Treating for canned goods group this Halloween.

This means calling a local food bank (probably Second Harvest Gleaners) and finding out what foods they may need the most, sending out fliers to the neighborhood we're planning to visit and making them aware that we're coming and finding some people who would be interested in helping out.

I'm really excited for this opportunity to help out. I've always loved trick or treating as a child and dressing up in costume and I can do these things now AND do something good for my community!

Having faith in myself is becoming a small issue, as I really want this to work out, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed :) I will keep updating with all of the details when I have them!

I got this idea when I came across this blog, So What Can I Do?. It not only has a list of things you can do this season, but it also has resources for anyone to help anywhere with anything! I know that I'd really like to be able to do more hands-on work with my community (as in volunteer work and the like) and sometimes... my mind draws a blank. Check it out.

If you have any experience in this sort of thing, or even any advice, I'd be more than happy to hear it!

Days 50 - 62

2009-09-17T00:46:00.003-04:00

Did you know Stephan Fry has a charity foundation for Bipolar Disorder? I have the link on my side bar, it's called Equilibrium, check it out :)

That just made my day!

I got a letter today from my friend Caitlyn who is far away in Japan right now- how exciting! She gave me an excellent suggestion about making some lists to help involve my readers (and it'll probably help to narrow down my scattered thoughts!).

So, here's a list from me:

5 Things I plan on doing to help someone else this season:
♥Volunteering at God's Kitchen
♥Donate food, money, clothes and blankets
♥Donate blood
♥Trick-or-Treat for canned food
♥Call 211 to see what else I can do :)

If you're reading this, feel free to give me your lists! :)

Days 47 - 49

2009-09-04T13:36:00.005-04:00

Alex and I were at the grocery store the other day waiting to check out when we noticed an older woman decked out head to toe in Harley Motorcycle leathers. Skull cap, long braid with leather covering it, heavy leather jacket, chaps and boots- she looked like a classic biker broad.

I shouldn't be quick so judge here, as my father is a biker and I've had many people in and out of my life who were bikers and wore very similar outfits and were lovely people all around, but for some reason, my first impression was that she was as mean as she looked.

The woman in front the biker woman had a baby on her hip as she was scanning her items on the self - check out and looked a bit frazzled... though, I didn't notice this until our friend in chaps bent down and picked up the items at the very bottom of the cart, that the mother would not have easily gotten with a moody baby attached to her, and placed them by the scanner for her.

It was at that point that I felt extremely stupid.
Doesn't it suck to be judged by your appearance? I'm the type of person who doesn't like to leave my home without mascara (at least)! I've always believed in looking nice where ever I go... But what if "looking nice" is different from person to person? Who was I to judge that biker woman for wearing leathers and having a gruff appearance? If I know anything about bikers (thanks dad!) I know that they're usually pretty damn proud of their bike and anything that has to do with their bike (e.g., their chaps, their leather jackets, etc.).

I remember my dad telling me a story about an old friend of his who was literally turned away from a church he'd wanted to attend when he showed up looking like a biker. I'm not sure if this meant he was in leathers, but I can imagine this meant NOT clean-cut Ralph Lauren polo shirts, cleanly shaven and short, trimmed hair... because I don't think my dad knows anyone like that! :) Ok, ok, that was me exaggerating slightly, but my point is that he looked different and that wasn't excepted- it was judged.

I don't have a picture of my dad and the matching leather jackets he and my mom have with a giant cross on the back, but I did find this picture online:

I think my dad might actually have a few of those stickers on his helmet too :)

I'm just trying to say here is that we all need to be given a chance. I shouldn't have judged that lady and that pastor shouldn't have judged my dad's friend. It's simple.

I was going to close this with The Golden Rule, but everyone knows it already! (Or at least they should!) So, I found some similar sayings all from different religious backgrounds that I'd really like to share :)

"The sage has no interest of his own, but takes the interests of the people as his own. He is kind to the kind; he is also kind to the unkind: for Virtue is kind. He is faithful to the faithful; he is also faithful to the unfaithful: for Virtue is faithful."
-Chapter 49, Tao Teh Ching (Taoism)

"None of you [truly] believes until he wishes for his brother what he wishes for himself." (Islam)

"One should never do that to another which one regards as injurious to one’s own self. This, in brief, is the rule of dharma. Other behavior is due to selfish desires." -Brihaspati, Mahabharata (Hinduism)

"Never impose on others what you would not choose for yourself" -Confucius

"Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD." -Leviticus 19:18

Just some food for thought.

Days 26 - 46

2009-09-01T19:29:00.003-04:00

Again, I fail at updating everyday. I'm thinking about making this a weekly post and reviewing the weekly "good deeds".

Truthfully, I almost gave up on this project. I'm going through a rough transformation in my life right now and I started beating myself up for not holding myself accountable for doing the good things I want so badly to do. Obviously, I've decided to endure- though, Alex had a lot to do with that. I've never known anyone in my life who has so much faith in me.

I don't know how many times I pass someone on my way to work standing on the corner holding a sign saying, "Will work for food", or "No job, need food or money". I am unfamiliar with this. I've seen it in pictures and I think I may have seen someone doing this once when I was very little, but... I see these people every day.

What really HURTS me is that I can't decide if I BELIEVE them. I've heard of all the horror stories of college students claiming they're jobless and have kids to feed when in reality they're BEGGING for money for a Playstation 3... so when I see a man carrying a cardboard sign on the corner of 54th and Clyde Park asking for food and/or money it is REALLY unfortunate that the first thing that runs through my mind is that they're faking it.

So, how can I overcome this? What if I saw someone who LOOKED like a beggar begging outside of the restaurant I work at and felt so bad I offer them some food... then saw that same begger dressed nicely, looking very much NOT like a beggar? Should I still offer food and money? Should I continue to ignore them? I remember having a teacher who said he preferred going out and buying someone a sandwich over handing over cash. And some people are more comfortable donating their money to a reputable charity because they KNOW the money is then being used for the right reasons.

Use your logic. There are charities for the homeless. Homeless people more or less know this. I'm not saying DON'T give your change to a beggar, because certainly you COULD be helping them out, but I strongly feel like by donating to a place like Mel Trotter is the option that will do the most good. Plus, if the charity organizations have the money we can finally start getting people off the streets in general.

I'm sure some people feel differently and I'd love to see other opinions on this!

For something that has been a problem for many, many years, I never realized how homelessness/beggars are becoming so prevalent here in Grand Rapids, Mi. Think about these things the next time you see someone asking for money :)

Day 25

2009-08-11T15:17:00.004-04:00

I tend to check my email as soon as I wake up in the morning. I'm obsessive and I'm ok with it :) Lately, all I've been getting are notifications from Facebook so I was surprised to get an email that wasn't related to my Facebook- let alone about my 365 days of love blog!

I'm kind of skeptical when I get emails from people I don't know, but I really had to check this out. Donating to charity without spending a dime myself? I was intrigued and thought this would be a great thing to blog about to see if I can get other people to take advantage of this.

Hotels Combined, a search engine that searches over 900,000 hotel deals worldwide for the best price possible, works on a word-of-mouth basis, donating what they save on advertising to charity! In order to do this, Hotels Combined is currently donating money to one of three charities when you mention them on your blog or become a fan on Facebook.

Mention them on your blog will earn your desired charity $20.
Becoming a fan of Hotels Combined will earn your charity $5.
Tweet about them on Twitter, and they'll donate $10 to your desired charity.

It gives you three options to donate to, WWF, Make-A-Wish, and World Vision. I immediately became a fan on their Facebook page and asked to donate to World Vision.

By mentioning Hotels Combined in this post, I'll be donating $20 to WWF :)

What gets me is that this is FREE! You have no reason not to check it out! That money really does add up.

I'd love to hear from anyone who might read my blog- to hear about what you do to help others, to hear what I could do myself, or just to chat :)

Days 11 - 24

2009-08-10T09:20:00.003-04:00

I really didn't mean to take this long to update!

For the past two weeks, Alex and I have been kind of busy! Alex is planning a a Bachelor party for his best friend, We had a family reunion, Alex had a couple 4am shifts on a few Saturdays too!

As for the good deeds for the last two weeks, Alex got really excited when a purchase at a gas station turned into "Proceeds are donated to So and So" the other day on his way to work. Speaking of donating to someone in need, we also made sure we ordered pizza at the Pizza Hut by our apartment on the day they were donating 20% of the proceeds to someone who had broken her neck and was thought to never walk again. She full recovered and the money was to help her pay off her hospital bills. It was good to be able to help out with that :)

There are several churches in our neighborhood that are having food drives right now. I was thinking about buying some non-perishables and dropping them off today or tomorrow. I'm really into the idea of donating when and what you can. I remember after my apartment burned down in December, the Red Cross donated some money to everyone in our apartment (probably even the whole building). My family helped me out as much as they could too, money and clothes and anything else they had to give. People at my work donated money for me as well, and the company matched that number and I just thought that was the most amazing thing! I had hardly been there a few months and it really humbled me. Some people helped out with clothes and food and bathroom supplies!

I lost everything and walked away with more than enough to take care of myself. That was such a good feeling that I want to make sure I can make someone else feel that way. I no longer just throw things away if they no longer fit, or if I no longer want them. We have a Goodwill within walking distance here! It's one of the most well known places to donate to!

Here are some links to GREAT places here in Grand Rapids, Mi to donate to:

Big Brothers, Big Sisters
Salvation Army
United Way-This is great to get phone numbers to homeless shelters and woman's shelters
The Red Cross
Cars 4 Causes

For Blood Drives and Plasma Donations:

If you're looking to end some money to charity and can't decide which one is best, don't sweat it. The fact that in this economy you've decided to donate your hard earned money is such a great one that you deserve to choose what you feel most strongly about. Go online and research your options! You can now donate money to an organization with just a click!

Check out the sites :) I'll update more. Promise.

Day 10

2009-07-27T23:44:00.002-04:00

Hotmail and the Greater Good
"Every time you use Windows Live™ Messenger or Windows Live Hotmail®, our free webmail service, we'll share a portion of our advertising revenue with the cause you choose from among our partner social cause organizations".

I've been using Hotmail for quite some time now and it's at no cost to me personally (not that I would mind donating). I asked for the money to be sent for the Red Cross, as they were the ones who gave me and my old room mates money to get back on our feet when our apartment burned down in December.

Check it out. :)

Day 9

2009-07-26T11:55:00.002-04:00

I'm really struggling to do this blog! I mean, I'm not a bad person, but I'm starting to feel like one for my lack of being able to update about doing something nice for someone!

Alex and I woke up late, did laundry at the laundrymat, hung out with my parents and talked politics, went grocery shopping and spent the rest of the day watching tv:) Aside from my parents, we've hardly had any real interaction with people today!

It makes me sad that I don't often think of other people and what I can do for someone on a day to day basis. Alex and I often talk about how the world would be different if people put others into consideration more. I want so badly to make a difference in the world and I feel like I haven't been doing a very good job of that.

The closest thing I've done today that even comes close to doing good is making a decision to always be in the 'good' side, that no matter what obstacles I meet. I will always try to do what is right, and to be extreme, to die for what I believe in.

I can't sit here and beat myself up for not having gone out of my way for someone today. So I wont. I'm just going to try harder tomorrow.

Day 8

2009-07-25T23:34:00.001-04:00

At work today, as I was bringing the check to my last table (which is always a good feeling), the black book I grabbed still had someones tip slip in it! I gave the correct bill to my table and gave my GM the slip to make sure the other server got his tip. It was $10- I wanted to make sure he got what he deserved!

I feel good about this because I'm kind of weird. I don't like to interfere with things and I usually ignore things that don't involve me. I'm trying to fix this for the most part :) I know I'd hate to have lost out on money that I worked so hard for!

Just a suggestion♥:
Try not to let your inhibitions get the best of you. Though this seemed like a very simple thing to do (make sure my co-worker got his tip), I'm super awkward and afraid of a lot of little things. It's part of that whole, putting-others-first thing :)

Day 7

2009-07-24T23:49:00.001-04:00

I'm grumpy. I've pretty much been grumpy all day. This is mostly from lack of sleep and stress.

Alex went back to work today (then tripped and bumped up his other leg). While he was gone, I super cleaned the living room and the kitchen. Ok, by that I mean I cleaned everything and left some of the dishes. I hate washing dishes... lol.

I tried to find an opportunity at work to go out of my way for someone... with no luck, given that we're supposed to be "hospi". :)

I'm still nursing Alex back to "health". He doesn't really like being babied (as he calls it) but... I can't help it. Even now, when I'm SO grumpy and tired, I still want to make sure he's comfortable propping his ankle up and making sure he's taking his ibuprofen and such.

I feel somewhat accomplished, being in such a bad mood and still putting Alex first.

Bed time now.
:)

Day 6

2009-07-24T00:14:00.003-04:00

Phew. I got up at 8 30am to bring Alex to Urgent Care this morning! I hope that counts as my one nice thing, because I was pretty much tired and lethargic all day!!

I got my second wind at work (though, I think that was out of necessity, really).

Short post. I'm really too tired to think! Bed time for me and Alex soon :)

A suggestions for those who might want to be nice today:
♥ While I was at work, the traffic lights over the busy intersection we're located on went out! My manager saw that people were flying by on Rivertown Parkway, ignoring traffic rules in this situation, leaving the traffic from the mall and the traffic on Potomac confused and unable to go safely in any direction. He promptly called the police (not 911, but the no emergency number, I'm sure) and filled them in on the situation. I was impressed by his quick thinking!

Don't be afraid to report something you see wrong! Whether it's a traffic light out causing people to act stupidly, a car accident or anything else that might happen on the road (or really, anywhere!), it's important to think of anyone else who might be effected :) I've even had a friend call non-emergency because someone flew by us on the highway going at least 100mph! Always try and be a Good Samaritan :)

Day 5

2009-07-22T21:23:00.002-04:00

Alex hurt his ankle today at work :( He left early and I've been taking care of him ever since.

On my way home from work this afternoon, I stopped at the grocery store and bought more ingredients for a cake and made him a new one! I didn't drop it either! :) I was just letting the cake cool when Alex called and I had to leave.

I was probably only 5 minutes out when it started to rain. And by rain, I mean downpour. Which, for some reason, made my power steering act wonky (I have no idea if these things are actually correlated). I was half way to his mom's house (his mom had picked him up from the warehouse so he wasn't rained on- also, she lives within walking distance to it) when I had to pull into a church parking lot and wait it out. His mother eventually just dropped him off at my car (which miraculously started working again...). That was fun.

I frosted the cake and then proceeded to make him dinner and fuss over his ankle.
I feel pretty good about it. I mean, I would have baked him the cake and made him dinner anyhow, but I haven't really let him get up to do much of anything :) Currently, he's playing Prince of Persia with his foot elevated and iced... I'm making sure the ice stays icey and getting him ibuprofen when he needs it.

That's really it for today. I can probably count some of the small things at work I did, but really, those things are technically my job (food running, etc.) and therefore, probably don't count :)

If anyone is reading this, think about some of the things you could do for someone. Also, remember a time someone has gone out of their way for you. Wouldn't you like to make someone else feel as good as you did then?

Day 4

2009-07-21T23:08:00.003-04:00

So, today... I didn't do anything nice. In fact, Alex and I didn't sleep well the last night, so I've been tired (ok and a little grouchy maybe...) I even ended up dropping his birthday cake in the stairwell of the apartment too. :(

This post is for Alex. I made him a cake that he was excited to try (when he really prefers brownies more- we don't have a brownie pan though) and he held me when I cried over his spilled cake. He was sweet and kind and did everything in his power to get me to smile again. He even asked me to make him another one (which, again, is big thing as he is more of a brownie person). I love him so much and for him to be so kind on his birthday (he even picked up the majority of the spill on the stairs!!) when he didn't need to be.

So, Happy Birthday Honey♥ Thanks for being so awesome.

A suggestions for those who might want to be nice today:
♥ Be like my boyfriend :) Eat the cake your girlfriend made, even if you're not into cake (or whatever else she made). It makes her feel good ;) And if something goes wrong (like she drops it...) let her redo it. That will make her feel even better :)

Day 3

2009-07-20T23:35:00.000-04:00

I love having a day off! Today was great because I DID fall back asleep after my 3am adventure and we slept in until almost noon! :) After such a long week, that was EXACTLY what we needed.

It was a pretty easy day. We both went to get our hair cut (I got bangs!) and I baked Alex his birthday cake- which was fun :) We grilled out and had S'mores at a friends house tonight and as soon as we got home I, again, say to Alex, "I haven't done anything nice today!!".

But I HAVE. Or at least so says my boyfriend. He's been playing Tom Clancey's Ghost Recon 2 Summit Strike and been stuck on one level in particular. So, being the awesome girlfriend (and gamer) that I am... I google. I helped him discover something about the level he didn't know previously. So, I hope I'm not taking credit away from the helpful guy posting the guide, but... Alex says this was a good deed, so I'm taking it! :)

Tomorrow is his birthday, and the day is so far fairly full! Lunch with a friend, hanging out with his Mom, I'm making him some yummy dinner and then cake with my parents! :) I seriously need to start focusing during the day about going out of my way for someone, and hopefully I can get a better grip on that tomorrow :) Here's hoping!!

A suggestions for those who might want to be nice today:
♥ Go volunteer somewhere! (Geez, I should start taking my own advice!) Places like Love inc., Goodwill and the Salvation Army are always eager to let people volunteer! It's a great thing to do! You may not get paid for your time, but think of the people you might end up helping somewhere down the road!

Day 2

2009-07-20T03:04:00.003-04:00

Phew! This week has been such a busy one! Yesterday was pretty great though. We saw Josh off in the morning- which I always hate. I see him every 6 months for a week at a time. It's hard to do.

Alex's 'birthday' was so much fun. Again, his birthday is on Tuesday but we celebrated with friends on Sunday. We'd planned to head up to the beach but summer here in Michigan has failed up and it was a whopping 68 degrees at like 11 30am. Weather.com lied. No beach. We thought zoo but ended up in Downtown Grand Rapids at the T. G. I. Fridays with our friends, Janelle and Ann. We pretty much had a blast.

Alex and I ended up falling asleep very very early on while watching Charmed and it's now 3am and I'm up! I was thinking of what I had done nice for someone yesterday and realized again what a challenge this is proving to be! I mean, I do what I can and I think I'm a decent person, but I'd never really stopped and thought to myself, "Remember to do something nice for someone!!".

When Josh was leaving we all gave him some money to use to get back and I think that will count as my one nice thing. I love my brother and I'd give him money if he needed it, so maybe it's cheating, but I felt pretty good about contributing to see my brother home safely :)

I have no suggestions as my brain is mush right now from my crazy sleeping habits last night/this morning... I should try and go back to bed I think... :) Not my best post, but I have 363 days left to show this one post up :)

Day 1

2009-07-19T10:07:00.009-04:00

Yesterday was a great day! Alex and I (and the fam) went to the wedding, then to the memorial and then to the reception, so everything turned out nicely, we saw a TON of family and ate a lot of really great food :) The bride looked gorgeous and more people than even last year showed up at my cousins memorial!

I know this project will be a bit of a struggle because it was nearly 10pm when I turned to Alex and said, "I haven't been nice to anyone!!!". He and I made some plans to hijack my father on to the dance floor so that my mother could dance with him, but the opportunity didn't exactly arise...

My brother is also in town from Virginia and he leaves today. He went to the wedding with us and we offered to bring him home. Here's where I'm counting my good deed for the day- He was meeting up with an old friend at Denny's and wanted us to hang out there with them for a short while as it's his last night in Grand Rapids. But this friend of his? We don't get along. We never have and probably never will. But I played nice for my brother. Kind of what I would call- getting over myself for the Greater Good. I don't have to like his friend, but because it meant so much to my brother it had to mean something to me... And having thought about it, this really was the perfect way to start my project as it was a situation similar to this that disturbed me enough to start all of this!!

So, my brother leaves for VA again today and we're also celebrating Alex's birthday today. It's on tuesday, but sunday seemed like a good day to gather friends and head to the beach!! Only, it's 70 degrees and cloudy out :(

I'm keeping my eyes open for opportunity to be a good person while also looking for an alternative to the beach for Alex. The zoo maybe? I just hope everybody we invited shows up- it makes the location less important when you have everyone you love with you, right?

Maybe my good deed will just be getting Alex out of bed this morning! Geez! :) I'll update again tonight or tomorrow!

A suggestions for those who might want to be nice today:
♥ Put someone else first. This can be in a big or small way. I say go big or go home and put someone first in a real big way :) You can come in second once in a while, huh? It often sounds like this, "Hey, what do YOU want to do today?". Just sayin' :)

365 days of love- first post

2009-07-18T08:54:00.002-04:00

I'm really no good at trying to introduce myself- in person or in writing. I'm rather awkward about it and in person I have a tendency to 'pretend' I've introduced myself by smiling really big at you if we make eye contact but bolting if that eye contact lasts too long and you start walking in my direction.
And if you already know me, you know I really am that awkward!

By definition, that probably makes me a jerk. But, that's why I'm here, actually. To become an un-jerk.

My boyfriend, Alex, is an un-jerk. He's an all around good guy. He's got a birthday coming up and it was discussing these birthday plans that sparked my idea for this blog... Even if we don't always want to, shouldn't we go out of our way, even in small ways, to do something good sometimes? Can't we get over ourselves for the greater good? It just takes one small act, right?

I'm not here to convince anyone how great of a person I am. Remember? I'm a jerk! I just think people need to do good just as much as they need others to be good to them. So, as hard as it might be, I am going to try for the next 365 days to be nice to someone. Anyone. I mean, seriously, this can be as small as opening a door for someone or as big as donating an organ. I'm game. One act a day. Or more, if I'm feeling really ambitious :) And I challenge anyone who reads this to do the same.

My day is just beginning though. I have a wedding for a beautiful cousin of mine and a memorial celebrating the life of another beautiful cousin of mine, so my day is full! But that doesn't mean I wont find time to do something nice for someone! I'll update with details, and hell, maybe even pictures, later! :)

A suggestions for those who might want to be nice today:
♥ It's hard right now for everyone financially. We ALL are suffering. Next time you're getting food, say at a fast food restaurant, offer to pay for the drink of the person behind you. It's what, an extra $1? It's a small token, and the cashier may even look at you funny, but it's totally worth it to see the smile on the dude with the free drink! Who knows, that might completely make their day...